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The deportation that never was

Last Thursday, the 30th of July, as I went to the Foreign Office/Ausländerbehörde to renew my Identity Card/Ausweis, they told me there was a bomb threat in the building and that they couldn’t work on my papers, that I should come back the next day, on Friday, at 8 o’clock in the morning, but on Friday, at around 3 o’clock in the morning, they came to deport me. I was praying in my room in the Heim when I heard a very strong knock on my door. I opened it and saw two police women standing there. Together with them was the boy from the Ausländerbehörde, the same boy who had told me to go back on Friday to renew my Ausweis. This boy is a wicked boy.

The first words which came out from his mouth were: “give me your Ausweis”. I gave him and he said: “this time you are going to Cameroon.”

The police women, who until now, had only stood there, asked if they could help me packing my things. I said no because I was not going to pack anything. They wanted me to get dressed and I asked them to wait outside the room so I could put on my clothes, but they didn’t accepted it and suggested I get changed in the toilet. They followed me to the toilet and watched over at the door until I was ready. I went back to my room and they followed me inside.

The boy stayed always in the corridor. His name is Herr Schley. He is around 30 years old and very wicked, a very bad person. There is also a girl in this Ausländerbehörde, Frau Donov. They are the ones responsible for renewing my Ausweis. They are both wicked. I can tell when I see wicked people.

I went to my room followed by the police women. I took my bag and packed it with my Bible. My Bible is like my child. I sleep with my Bible, I am always with it. I also packed the dress I wear for praying and went out, locking the door behind me. And then I heard the wicked boy saying: Tschüß, as he took the key from me. He now had my Ausweis and my Key.

There was a car outside. The boy got in and sat next to the driver, who had been waiting there. I sat on the back seat in the middle of the two police women, like someone who had committed a crime. I was being taken to the airport and on the way they were laughing and speaking amongst themselves in german. I could understand a little bit, they were laughing at me. What came out from my mouth was to cry. I cried to God, I said “God, in my heart, I don’t know what to do, I can’t understand what is going on”. When I stopped crying I got my Bible from my bag and opened on the story of Job. I bended over my body and cried a little more. The others in the car couldn’t look straight to my face because they felt ashamed.

When we reached the airport, we had to wait because the airport was still closed. The time was around 3:30 in the morning. It didn’t take us long from the Heim to the Tegel airport.

They parked the car in front of the main doors and the driver, the wicked boy and one of the police women went outside to have fresh air. I was left in the car with the other police woman, who was making sure I couldn’t run away. I was feeling really tired, but I asked them if I could also go outside for a bit of fresh air. They said no. It was as if I was in a prison, as if I had killed someone. That was what was going through my head.

I stayed in the car until 4 o’clock in the morning and, during this time, they never gave me anything to eat or to drink and they were still laughing at me.

When the airport opened, they escorted me inside. Only the driver stayed behind.

As I was going through the security check-in and was asked to give my bag and my jacket, I decided to start removing all my clothes. I told them: you people want to see something? I will show you! And I begun to strip off everything I was wearing. They stopped me before I could take off my tights and the tiny blouse I was wearing underneath my blouse. I begun to cry and to roll on the floor and at the same time I was shouting and telling them I was going to kill myself.

A big police man from the airport had pity on me and approached. He held me, picked up my clothes from the floor and tried to make me wear them back on, but I told him that if I was going to die I didn’t need any of those clothes, they couldn’t help me anymore. This man took me to a separate room, he offered me a chair to sit, which I refused. I sat on the floor, because sitting on a chair could not help me either. Then he started asking me some questions like how long had I been in Germany, if I had arrived 6 or 3 months ago. I told him I have been here for almost 6 years. The man bent over his head, took some paper, wrote something on it and gave it to police. He told me: in four days time you will be sent back to Cameroon.

The police, the boy, those who had watched everything I did, now had to take me back to the Heim. The man gave them the paper and they had to collect all my things from the floor and drive me back to the Heim. I was semi naked in the car. I refused to dress up. This time, I sat alone in the back and they were no longer talking to each other or laughing, they were all quiet, all of them. They kept silent all the way back.

When we arrived in Hennigsdorf, they opened the door and I went outside the car, they gave me my bag and my clothes. I thought those things had stayed in the airport, but they had brought them back. The wicked boy gave me my keys back as well as my Ausweis. He didn’t say a word to me. He was not feeling well.

Yesterday, Tuesday, I went to the Ausländerbehörde and saw him. He saw me, but he couldn’t look at my face. He was looking down, ashamed.

When I went there I was prepared to die. I’ve already told them I am capable of killing myself. I was there to renew my Ausweis and the boy ran away. In his place came the other wicked woman. I was angry and I didn’t want to look them straight on their faces, so when they finished with it, they called me and returned my Ausweis, telling me to come back on the 14th, next week.

As I walked away from this place, I started thinking of this sister. When I got home, I saw I had a missed call on my phone. I couldn’t recognize the number, but I thought, let me check who was it and I called back. It was the sister I was thinking of and she told me she was in the Heim. I told her I was just thinking of her. She asked me where I was and I told her I was in my room. She said she wanted to come over because people have told her what had happened to me. And so she did and after I explained everything to her, she begun giving me a bit of counseling, some advices, because I didn’t know what to do. She told me I must not sleep in the Heim at least for sometime. She contacted you, she called this woman who spoke in french with me and we made an appointment for today at 11h. Finally I got myself a lawyer. Until now I didn’t have a good lawyer. I had one, to who I went on Friday, after all this happened. I went to see her and she didn’t even greet me, as If I am nothing. And I am there with this type of problem. Anytime I went there she said she was going to do something she never did, she was always lying. I payed her, almost 500 Euro already. I gave her documents from Africa and it was never enough, she kept asking me for more documents, but I said to her: these things cost money and I can not keep bringing documents. Try and work with these you have. In the end I am trying to tell you, only God can help me. God touched you and you are a good person, but humans can not help me. It is God who helps me.

So that is the end of my story. The whole day I was working to find a lawyer. Thanks that you are helping to write for me. Thank you and may god bless you.

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